More on dealing with rejection.
( 1 Pet 4:8(b) – love will cover a multitude of sins. NKJV
I’ll be wrapping up on this series on dealing with rejection today but hopefully will revisit it sometime in the future. This is partly because I believe I have covered most of the angles and also due to the fact that from this coming Saturday we’ll be going on radio. I’d like to have the same message cut across all our platforms so next week we’ll be starting at the very beginning with our Designer God. As I wrote last week, we need to understand how rejection plays out so as to be able to tackle it.
After the manipulation has not worked and the person rejecting you will not budge the reality of the rejection sets in. With this comes a flood of emotions including anger, shame and fear not in any particular order. For Tamar the pain and bitterness was overwhelming. Remember she said the pain of the rejection was worse than the rape. Imagine how traumatic the rape must have been. A violation of her body, soul and spirit and yet she said the pain of rejection was more than this. 2 Samuel 13:16).
The issue is that it’s not what you have done or said or who you are that makes that person reject you. If they wanted to accept you they would make allowances for all those your so – called shortcoming. They already made up their mind to reject you so all the other things are just what they have had to make up along the way. No one is perfect but they have decided not to deal with your own kind of imperfections. It’s a free world. They are free to reject you and it’s your choice if you want to overcome it or let it damage your soul.
After you have vented the anger and pain it’s time to take a look at the reasons you were given for the rejection. Some of the reasons given by the rejector may be valid, such as “you are too clingy”, “ you except too much of me and I just can’t live up to your expectations”. The list is endless. You need to take a close look at this for areas you need to ask God for help. Remember we said rejection is God’s redirection and this may come in the way of you confronting character flaws. At times the person doing the rejecting may not even give you reasons and they may not have any reasons just like Amnon in 2 Samuel. Still there is always something God wants us to learn.
It’s time to turn your face up to God. What rejection does, is that it chips away at your self – worth and your self – value. A chunk of you is broken away and if you don’t look to God to heal you and restore you it will affect future relationships. You will begin to approach new relationships with caution and won’t ever be able to love or trust without abandon because there will always be that little voice whispering that you are not good enough. You are good enough for a God who is more than enough.
Remember in Psalm 27:10, David says when my father and my mother forsake me, then the Lord will take me up. Run into the hands of a loving God and drink from the fountain of His unquenchable love. It is only Him that will totally satisfy the longings of your soul.